The worst thing that will ever happen to me just did. I lost the Person who made me fit in the World. The one who gave equilibrium to everything. My connection to People and the best parts of my own humanity.
Life can do nothing to me now. It has depleted its ammunition depot. No matter what happens the rest of my life on Earth, I can’t be hurt. I’ve already been that. Now I’m just numb to everything.
Two weeks and the cyclone pounding me in what Grief Counselors call the “Whirlwind” Stage hasn’t diminished. It still bashes me about. That’s an odd experience for someone who’s never lost control, never been out-equipped, out-gunned so to speak. Never once an obstacle or foe that could not be overcome. But this beat me.
Now comes the endless exercise of carrying on. Life loves its cruel little jokes.